Worrying can be helpful when it motivates you to take action and solve a problem. But if you’re preoccupied with “what ifs” and worst-case scenarios it can be paralyzing. "What if" scenarios and unrelenting fears can drain your emotional energy, increase your anxiety, interfere with your relationships, and even cause you to become physically ill. Luckily, chronic worrying is a mental habit that can be broken. You can train your brain to stay calm and look at life from a more positive perspective.
When you start to spiral into worry and anxiety, try taking these steps to break the habit.
Determine if the problem is solveable
Solvable worries are those you can take action on right away. For example, if you’re worried about debt, you can come up with a plan to pay it off over time and implement that in your life. Unsolvable worries are those for which there is no corresponding action, like “What if I get cancer someday?” or “What if I get into an accident?”
If the worry is solvable, start brainstorming on how to solve it. Make a list of all the possible solutions you can think of. Don't get hung up on the "perfect" solution, as most of the time there is no perfect solution. Focus on the things you have the power to change, rather than the things beyond your control. After you’ve evaluated your options, make a plan of action. Once you have a plan and start doing something about the problem, you’ll feel much less worried.
If the problem is not solveable...
But what if the worry isn’t something you can solve? If you’re a chronic worrier, the majority of your worried thoughts probably fall in this camp. You also have probably noticed that most of the time the stress and anxiety you have caused yourself worrying about the "What if's" is far more painful than any of the possible outcome.
First, when you have these types of anxieties it means you are living in the future. You're focused on what may happen instead of what's actually happening in your present. I'd first suggest learning how to be mindful and present. Find out what types of activities help you be mindful. Some examples include meditation, exercising, and journaling.
Second, I recommend imagining what the worst possibly outcome of the situation is and then determine how you would handle it. By actually preparing yourself for how you can deal with the outcome, you'll feel empowered and realize you do have the skills to successfully deal with any situation. Over time you'll be more confident that you can handle any situation which comes your way, and the excessive worrying will likely decrease.
Finally, try to accept uncertainty. There is never a right answer, and nothing is guaranteed. You also will never all all of the information. By accepting uncertainty in situations, you can let go of the worries and focus your attention on the things you can control, enjoy, or appreciate.
How do you decrease your tendencies to worry?